3. “I’m busy and I don’t have time for you right now.”
Narcissists, especially those of the more overt nature, will need every moment of your time, or at the very least, they will expect you to drop whatever you’re doing when they want or need your attention at any given moment. Their inflated sense of entitlement and a lack of actual self makes it impossible for them to spend any time alone. They really can’t stand the idea of having to fend for themselves and they might have to face themselves if you leave them alone for too long. So no matter if you’re at work or you’re taking care of your kid or doing anything else at all, they’re going to want your attention in the very second they ask for it. If you don’t dole it out as requested, they’re going to crumble into a big old pile of narcissistic injury.
As always, when that doesn’t work, the rage will soon follow. Why? Well, because they feel like they’re not important to you if you don’t drop everything the moment they want you to. So to avoid drama here, you can try saying something like, “I’ll be right there,” or “We can talk at this time instead.” But even that won’t be good enough for most of them. Many narcissists are even going to go so far as to sabotage your job and push away all of your friends in order to monopolize your time.
4. “You’re a failure,” or “I’m so disappointed in you.”
Telling a narcissist that they’re a failure or that you’re disappointed in them in any way sort of tugs at that false self, the mask they hide behind for most people. Even if they already know that you know who they are, acknowledging they’re anything less than perfect is only going to enrage and offend them.
Related: The Best Way to Put Narcissists In Their Place.
Side note: even if someone else shares this kind of sentiment with them, they’re likely to take out their negative feelings on you as a sort of emotional garbage dump. For example, if their boss at work gives them a bad review or points out a mistake, they might come home and ruin your night as a result of it. To avoid drama in this case, you would need to take their side in every situation and agree that it isn’t their fault somehow, which brings me to number five.
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