1. Become bullet-proof.
Now, admittedly, this requires that you actually have some healing and recovery under your belt. It’s a lot easier to be bullet-proof when you’re dealing with a toxic, destructive, manipulative, bully, for example, when you’re not walking around with a bunch of unresolved pain and trauma in your field. So give yourself the gift and actually do the work. Whatever that means for you, there’s a lot of ways that this can be done.
In addition, you want to decide what it is that you are and are not available for, and stick to it. You set the standard in your life. You decide where you draw the line in the sand. And you decide what you will and will not put up with. And you decide what you’re available for. Set the standard in your own life and hold the line. You also want to stop reacting to their nonsense and their BS, right?
I’m not saying this is easy. This certainly takes some practice. Again, healing and recovery under our belt can make a big difference, but the more non-reactive we can be in the face of what it is that they typically bring to the table, the easier it’s going to be for you to be able to command respect when dealing with someone who lands on the spectrum of destructive narcissism. However, inauthentic that respect maybe, life will be easier for you. Again, you’ll feel more empowered and you’ll be much better off.
Using the grey rock method can be a really good way to deal with what’s coming at you from this type of individual in a very non-reactive way. The bottom line is you want to do whatever you need to do to no longer be an appealing target or a source of narcissistic supply for this individual.
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