3. Inadequacy.
Not many of us really like our own inadequacies. We don’t like making mistakes. However, with a narcissist, any of their perceived limitations or mistakes, if they are brought up, this is a direct hit to the narcissist’s grandiosity, to their ego, and it triggers a defense mechanism where they’re going to confront you with denial, blame-shifting, or hostility. So, when communicating with a narcissist, you need to avoid any form of communication that’s going to undermine them.
For Mor: 5 Guaranteed Ways To Defeat a Narcissist.
They’re like that little toddler who’s going to go off. However, you’re not allowed to discipline them; you just got to put up with whatever attacks they have on you. And you shouldn’t have to. Therefore, we have to recognize that calling them out on their inadequacy is never going to help them; it’s going to hurt them. And they lack empathy, so they’re going to seem to punish you. Notice their mistakes, recognize their mistakes as who they are as a person, and create a safe distance from them.
4. Vulnerability.
We all have our vulnerabilities and weaknesses, and they’re not always the most pleasant of things to bring up. And when you’ve been with a narcissist, you can open up and be vulnerable about your feelings, and they criticize you, mock you, bring you crashing down, and leave you questioning your self-worth. With a narcissist, they project an image to those around them with that charismatic charm, that they’re super confident and invincible.
Related: 9 Demeaning Things Narcissists Say.
Vulnerability threatens their carefully crafted self-serving image that they’ve maintained to sell those around them, to exploit those around them, to get what they need. This often leads to them becoming more manipulative with aggression and employing tactics like silent treatments, gaslighting, projection, triangulation, and withdrawal as they try to regain control over the situation. When a narcissist feels vulnerable, it’s often when they will shut down on you or attack you in some way.
Recommended: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
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