Number 4: Document.
Narcissists are skilled at gaslighting, at rewriting history to suit their narrative. They will deny hurtful words, dismiss abusive behavior, and make you question your own memory through gaslighting. Documentation serves as a vital strategy when dealing with a narcissist, particularly in situations where co-parenting or legal disputes are involved. It functions in two primary ways: documenting their positives and documenting the negatives.
For More: 6 Rumours Narcissists Like To Spread About You.
What does that mean? Let me explain. Documenting the positive involves keeping a record of all the positive things you do, especially in a co-parenting situation. This means keeping track of the time you spend with your children, the activities you engage in, and any special moments or milestones. This could also include school events you attended, doctors’ appointments you took them to, or simple everyday moments of care and bonding.
This is important because narcissists often attempt to undermine you or your parenting skills by making false accusations or spreading lies. They may try to paint you as a neglectful or unfit parent, hoping to turn others, including judges and lawyers, against you. By documenting the positive, you can counter these claims with concrete evidence of your dedication and love as a parent.
Related: Here Is How to Beat a Narcissist at Their Own Game.
On the flip side, documenting the negative involves keeping a record of the narcissist’s abusive or manipulative behavior. This includes instances of verbal, emotional, or even physical abuse. It could also involve noting any attempts by the narcissist to manipulate or control you or your children. This could also include instances where they have neglected their responsibilities as a parent. This record can serve as crucial evidence if you ever need to prove the narcissist’s abusive behavior in a legal setting. It also helps you maintain a clear picture of reality, which can be essential when dealing with the narcissist’s gaslighting attempts.
Recommended: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
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