#3. The best life charade.
This is where they put on a show of thriving without you, but with a twist. Suddenly, they’re living it up on social media. They’re the picture of happiness, and often with a shiny new partner in tow. But don’t be fooled; this isn’t about moving on. It’s a little bit about filling that supply gap, and it’s also a lot about getting under your skin.
So how can you tell that the second part is true? Well, you might notice that they’ve magically transformed into the exact person you’ve always wanted them to be. Remember that dream vacation you begged them to take? Well, look at them; they’re there right now with their new supply. That hobby you wished they’d share? Suddenly, they’re experts. It’s kind of like they’ve stolen your wishlist and are ticking off items one by one. And they’re making sure you know about it through mutual friends or accidental run-ins. This isn’t a coincidence; it’s calculated. They’re planting these triggers, hoping you’ll react. They want you to reach out, to question, to show you still care. It’s all part of their game to pull you back in.
But it’s all smoke and mirrors. That perfect life is as fake as their promises to change. They haven’t suddenly become a better person overnight; they’ve just temporarily become better at pretending. So remember, this is just another tactic. When you see this on social media, don’t take the bait. They’re still the same person who couldn’t meet your needs before. Don’t let this carefully crafted illusion make you doubt your decision to go no contact. Your peace is worth so much more than their performance. Protect your peace at all costs, people.
#4. Silent sabotage.
Here’s how a narcissist might use this tactic when you go no contact. This tactic, the silent sabotage, is the narcissist’s stealth missile. They’re not coming at you directly; they’re undermining you from the shadows. Think of it as whisper campaigns and subtle smear tactics. They might spread little seeds of doubt about you to mutual friends or family. You won’t hear it from them, but suddenly everyone’s asking if you’re okay, or if you’re doing alright. Or maybe they’re playing the victim, sharing how hurt they are by your sudden decision. This isn’t about clearing their name; it’s about muddying yours. They want to isolate you and make you doubt yourself. They’re hoping you’ll come running back just to set the record straight.
This is the trap, and you might be tempted at this point. But responding is exactly what they want; it gives them an opening, a way back in. Remember, they’re playing the long game here. They don’t need you to come back right away; they just need to keep you engaged. And if silent sabotage doesn’t work, don’t worry, they’re just getting started. At this stage, it’s still a game to them. They’re testing the waters, seeing what gets a reaction. So stay strong, stay silent, and watch their tactics evolve.
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