Today, we are talking about what you can expect when you go no contact with a narcissist or a family of narcissists.
First of all, let me explain what no contact means because there is a lot of confusion out there. No contact means exactly that no contact of any kind, so that includes text messages, looking at their social media, driving by their house, going to the same gym, sharing dogs, wishing them a happy birthday, trying to work with them, keeping in touch with their parents, etc.
When we say no contact, we mean nothing, zero contact of any kind or form. This also means blocking them from any way of contacting you through any medium.
The reason this is necessary is because usually, we have come to a place in our lives where we finally realize that this relationship is toxic and that any communication with this person will end in us being abused or exploited. We do not go no contact as a means of revenge, or torture, or for cruelty sakes, we do it because we finally understand that no contact is the only way.
Another critical point to make here is that, for many of us, we will be trauma bonded to the narcissist. A trauma bond is a very real and literal biological and physiological addiction that we have to the narcissist, who is a very real and serious abuser most times. Therefore, we are fighting to end a harmful, and in some cases, deadly addiction that we have to the abuse abusive narcissist.
Related: 5 Lessons You MUST Learn From A Relationship With A Narcissist
And because of this, you must treat it like any other serious addiction, which means 100% abstinence. If you were addicted to heroin and you decided to get clean, do you think it would be appropriate to say, well, I can still mingle with my drug dealer, or I can still do heroin on my birthday and Christmas? No, of course, you wouldn’t say those things because you would know that it would start the addiction, and the pain, and the withdrawal all over again. It’s the same thing when you are trauma bonded to someone, and why no contact of any kind must be sought and achieved in order to get healthy.
Now, there will be some of you where no contact is simply not an option. For example, if you share children with one of them. In these cases, we go as low and detached contact as humanly possible. However, for this article, this is for those of us who can go no contact, and I’m going to give you my top five things you can expect from narcissists when you implement no contact.
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