4. Hold your boundaries.
And the fourth sign is to hold your boundaries, even when it seems that the narcissist is throwing a fit about it. And this one does not work instantly, but it does work if you’re consistent over time. So essentially, you’re training the narcissist to respect you. Now, remember we were going to be a little bit more mysterious and not share our feelings with the narcissist, and that is going to include your feelings about their behavior.
For More:b7 Things Narcissists Fear The Most.
And this one can be a little bit tricky because that sounds like you’re just becoming a doormat to the narcissist, and I would absolutely not suggest that. You don’t need to bow down to the narcissist, but instead of having the conversation about how their words or actions or hurting you, or make you feel, you can use boundaries to communicate that you’re just not going to put up with it. There’s no need for a conversation. You treat me this way and I walk away. That’s it. And if you want to know how to force boundaries with a narcissist, read this article here.
You may also like:
- 10 Signs You are Trauma-Bonded With A Narcissist.
- What The Narcissist Does When You Go No Contact.
- Ask These 7 Questions To a Narcissist & Watch them Squirm.
- 10 Weird Texting Habits of Narcissists.
5. Stop people-pleasing.
The next tip I have for you is to stop people-pleasing if you are doing so at all. Do not ask how you can make the narcissist’s life easier. Don’t ask what you could do for them, and if they ask you a favor, seriously consider whether it’s in your best interest to do it. You can still help the narcissist if you feel that it is in your best interest to do so. But just make sure that’s not the default and make sure that you’re not putting yourself out to make them happy. And this also includes listening to them emotionally dump on you.
A Book: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men.
So if they’ve had a bad day, we all know what it’s like when you are just fine. And someone comes in with a dark cloud over their head and they’re just, just dumping all of their negativity and maybe anger or sadness, and it’s kind of just like they’ve got a bucket and they’re like, here you take it. Especially if you are a people pleaser and a highly empathetic person, you may be in the habit of taking that bucket. But when it’s all said and done, you know you walk away feeling much worse. Just feel this heavy energy over you. And that’s not fair to you. So this is another way that we end up people pleasing, and it’s something that has to stop if you want the narcissist to respect you.
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