Number 1: Selfish and self-centered to the extreme.
Everything is about them. The world revolves around them. All they think about is themselves. All they talk about is themselves. All they’re concerned with is the gratifying and fulfillment of their own desires, wants, wishes, needs, and personal comfort. Your comfort does not matter. Your feelings do not matter. Your preferences do not matter. Your opinion is irrelevant.
As far as he’s concerned, you are an extension of him, like an appendage, there only to serve a purpose, like for example, keeping house, raising his kids, and whatever else he feels is necessary to prop him up, and make him look and feel good, which by the way, includes being his emotional punching bag. He has no problem disappointing, hurting, deceiving, and exploiting you. As long as he gets his way and his needs are met, that’s all that really matters to him. And this extremely selfish and self-centered nature leads directly to number two.
Number 2: He’s highly insensitive.
The effect and the very real impact that his insensitive attitude, choices, and behavior have on you don’t even register on his radar. As far as he’s concerned, he should be able to come and go as he pleases, do whatever he pleases, cop with whatever hurtful and destructive attitude he pleases, lashes out whenever and however he pleases, with zero consideration for the impact that this has on you and the quality of your life.
Again, your comfort does not matter. Your emotional and psychological well-being is a nonissue for him. He couldn’t care less. In fact, he actually feeds off of your intense negative emotional outbursts, which is why he goes out of his way to provoke you. He gets a sick kick out of watching you come undone. He’ll never discuss what he’s actually done to trigger you, but rather focuses entirely on your reaction, so he can shame and blame you for the pain he himself is causing you.
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