Number 6: Express words or phrases with double meanings.
Covert narcissists can put people down without appearing malicious or cruel by expressing words or phrases. They may make insults sound like compliments or hide their resentment through pleasant language. They will do whatever it takes to convince people that they never meant to communicate the negative feelings by sugar-coating them with positive ones.
For instance, a covert narcissist’s way of congratulating someone’s achievement would be like: “I never expected your skills to bring you this far but look at you now!” Narcissists will try to express it as gullibly as possible to hide their feelings of envy or resentment while indirectly putting down the other person simultaneously.
Number 7: Gaslights.
Covert narcissism and gaslighting are often intertwined. Covert narcissists do not admit it and would never directly show any hint of narcissism in them. Hence, they use gaslighting to make other people believe they are not narcissists. They indirectly show their narcissistic behaviour, then eventually deny it when such narcissistic behavior is called out, which in turn, makes other people confused, and may even lead other people to think of themselves as offensive.
Recommended: Healing from Hidden Abuse: A Journey Through the Stages of Recovery from Psychological Abuse.
For example, let us take the covert narcissist’s expression of words or phrases with double meanings. When people call it bad, covert narcissists may simply deny it by saying: “I was just trying to compliment you. I did not mean it that way.” As a result, other people may feel guilty for perceiving the covert narcissist’s goodness the wrong way.
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