7. I WAS ONLY JOKING.
When you confront a narcissist about their insults, they often use this gaslighting term. Rather than accepting responsibility or apologizing, they claim you misunderstood their joke. As a result, the guilt is effectively shifted to you. It states it wasn’t meant as an insult but rather as a joke, and you misinterpreted it. It’s a smart strategy to get away with offending you because they have the option to return it. If you call them out on it, they’ll claim it’s a joke. Whether or not it’s a joke, their rude and negative statements have an impact on you because your brain is still processing them, and they are also getting stronger and more regular over time. Its purpose is to provoke doubt; the victim is expected to believe they behaved inappropriately or that they are too sensitive or ignorant to recognize the remark as a joke. However, the truth is that it was not all like that.
Recommended Book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
8. YOU’RE OVERSENSITIVE OR OVERREACTING.
When you protest about a narcissist’s words, they may accuse you of being oversensitive. Similar to “I was only joking,” this shifts the blame to you and your reaction once more, allowing the narcissist to avoid taking responsibility and reflecting on themselves. Someone who genuinely cares about you and isn’t out to hurt you would take your issue seriously rather than ignore it. Think about it; what’s more telling is when they continue to make the same jokes in the future. This demonstrates that the intent is to damage your emotions. This is claimed to make a victim feel guilty for being upset about whatever the abuser said or did. Few things can shut a person down faster than shame, and when a person is shut down, they are less likely to complain about the abuse.
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