1. “Your perceptions are your perceptions”.
The first one that I use, and one of my very favorite ones, is to simply say, “your perceptions are your perceptions”, I have no control over the way you choose to interpret things, nor do I want that burden. You are entitled to think whatever you like, regardless of whether or not your perceptions are accurate or based in reality, and then, leave it at that.
This will not only confuse the narcissist, as they are typically used to you going on the defensive, by saying this, you turn the tables on the narcissist and show them that you really could care less what their absurd perceptions and conclusions are and that they don’t affect you in the least.
2. “Your anger is not my responsibility”.
Another wonderful phrase and response you can use to disarm the narcissist when they are angry or in a rage, or trying to blame you and bait you into an argument, is to simply say, “listen, your anger is not my responsibility, if you want to be angry, help yourself, but it has nothing to do with me and I am not going to engage with you when you are in this state. Call someone who cares”, and then, leave it at that.
If the narcissist continues and won’t leave you alone about it, keep your cool and leave the house. I mean, seriously, if you must get away from them, leave the house, their rage and anger will pass. And by ignoring them and not giving them the reaction that they are desperately trying to extract from you, you will totally throw them off, and confuse them, and In doing so, you will be taking back your power and showing them that these manipulations and tricks of theirs are no longer working on you.
A Book: Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men.
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