1. Guilt-tripping you for establishing boundaries.
The toxic or narcissistic person is very likely to try and guilt-trip you for establishing boundaries. So the narcissist might say something like, how could you? How could you be so cruel? I don’t deserve this, I’m your mother or your sister. You’re doing this because you enjoy hurting me, normal people who love each other would never implement rules to be a part of each other’s life, you’re doing this out of spite, or they might say, why are you wanting to hurt me? However they say it, you can nearly always count on a huge guilt trip when you implement new boundaries with a toxic person.
2. Trying to shame.
You likely will face the toxic person trying to shame you for establishing boundaries. So they might say something like, “I have never seen a loving son do this to his own father. After all, I’ve done for you and these are the things I get, what kind of a son are you?” “Or they might say, you’re a horrible daughter who only thinks about herself, a good and loving daughter would never do something so despicable to her own mother, how could you?”
Shame is a very powerful deterrent, and no one knows this more than the narcissist. They know if they can make you feel bad about who you are as a person, for god forbid wanting some guidelines as to what is and what isn’t acceptable for your life, then they have a very good chance of getting you to disregard these new boundaries you’re trying to establish.
Don’t fall for it. Don’t give in, and see this maneuver for exactly what it is, a manipulation and abuse tactic.
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