1. Covert Narcissists Are Difficult to Detect and Expose.
The first of the two things I would like to talk about is that not only a covert narcissist difficult to detect, but they are difficult to expose. I have seen videos and articles out there that claim to provide signs of a covert narcissist. The initial impression given is that anyone can spot a covert narcissist if they only knew the signs. But when it comes down to it, these signs are for people who are in a relationship with the covert narcissist, and I don’t just mean romantically; it can be as a family member or friend as well.
Because what does covert mean; it means hidden, secret, not openly shown, concealed, etc. And for the covert narcissist, it means only a very small percentage of people get to see behind the mask to the vast majority; their true nature is a secret. The fact of the matter is that covert narcissists are slippery, sneaky, and are already very difficult to pin down because of the very nature of their narcissism.
They are also great pretenders, so they can feign empathy and other emotions quite well, only someone who is aware and in a relationship with one will be able to point out the red flags. If the person is not aware of narcissism and narcissist, they’ll just think this person is moody, complicated, confusing, emotionally draining, but they will not realize the severity of the situation that they are in and what it’s doing to their health and state of mind. While for the remaining public, all they see is what the covert narcissist wants them to see.
When it comes to securing evidence of abuse to expose them, the person within the relationship will find it difficult to secure proof or explain to anyone that they are being mistreated if the abuse remains insidious in nature. Meaning; manipulation gaslighting, lying, silent treatments, infidelity, etc. And that is a big “If” because the abuse can change but I will be touching on that in the next point so stay with me.
But even if you caught the covert narcissist in a lie or something else they should not be doing, they are so good at excuse in their behaviour, and also give the impression that it was a one-off event, which is outside of their character. This is also one of the prime times when they will probably act all vulnerable and cry their evil eyes out and play the victim so that they are taken off what they did wrong to how upset they are.
This is why it’s not worth trying to pin them down or try to expose them to other people who will be too blind to see what you are on about, and who in turn will probably turn around and label you as the toxic one.
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