#2. Being successful, especially if you’re more successful than them.
I remember when I was in a business partnership with a narcissist. Even if something happened that was good for me, which would end up being good for the business overall, my business partner just could not stand it. If I ended up having a TV gig that would happen to me, which ultimately would bring great PR for the business, the business partner would be like, “Oh, that sounds great,” like when you are with somebody who is clearly not happy for you, who’s clearly bringing you down, who’s obviously jealous, who’s obviously competitive, and who’s not building you up.
The people who I allow into my circle now build me up. They’re excited. They want to see you succeed more because true people who are there for you, who are excited for you, know that when your light shines, it has nothing to do with their light shining. It’s sort of like when stars in the sky shine; it has nothing to do with another star in the sky shining. Or if a flower blooms, it has nothing to do with the flower next to it blooming. All the flowers can bloom, all the stars can shine, but narcissists don’t understand that. They feel like if one shines, then another one can’t—that somehow they’re somewhat related, even though it has nothing to do with the other. But you being successful or you being more successful than them just drives them absolutely crazy, and it makes them miserable.
Recommended Book: Becoming the Narcissist’s Nightmare: How to Devalue and Discard the Narcissist While Supplying Yourself- By Shahida Arabi.
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