Number 3: “Everybody thinks you’re crazy, have anger issues, are unstable, or are the problem.”
Here’s the thing, Narcissists use sweeping statements a lot. In particular, when they’re trying to back-pedal their way out of whatever corner they’ve painted themselves into. They’ll use a lot of everybody and no one statements. They also use a lot of always and never statements. So when they’re throwing those words around, back the hell up and do not engage. They’re baiting you, period.
Number 4: “I don’t know what your problem is.”
The important thing to remember when dealing with someone who lands on the spectrum of destructive narcissism is this: The moment they experience any sort of resistance, lack of cooperation, or pushback from you. In other words, the moment you’re not having it, and now they know you’ve clued into the fact that they aren’t even remotely close to being the person they want you and everyone else to believe they are, they are going to have to make you the problem.
Whatever it takes, you’re the issue. You have to be the issue, because if it isn’t you, then who might it be? That’s a real head-scratcher.
Number 5: “I’ve been nothing but pleasant to you, good to you, kind to you even.”
Seriously? Like I have to wonder, do they even hear themselves when they speak? To be fair, while it may be true that to some degree they’ve shown up with faint kindness from time to time, especially if anyone else was watching. That does not negate or erase all of the awful things they’ve done and said before, during, and after, showing up and smiling nicely whenever it suits them to do so.
Pretending like all is well as a manipulative ploy, pretending they’re the good guy or a girl in the dynamic, pretending to have no ever-loving idea what your issue with them could possibly be. All of this is nothing more than pure manipulation, deception, and a little game they play to A, gaslight, and confuse the hell out of you. And B, avoid all together any accountability or natural consequences for the awful way they’ve behaved.
It’s an act, a performance. They’re fake, as all get out, and you don’t have to buy what they’re selling no matter who else may be falling for the nonsense. See it for what it is, and stay clear in so much as you are able.
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